Upside down

Why is it that as soon as you start to get it together, or are heading in the right direction...you lose it. I was feeling great. I just blogged like 100 verses for crying out loud! I felt like I had a handle on things and right about the time I felt like OK, I can do this, I started feeling completely overwhelmed, out of control, emotionally unstable. AND I DON'T LIKE IT! I'm not talking about weight issues for once. I'm talking about my schedule for the next 2 weeks. I'm freaking out. Why?! I don't know! Impending T.O.M. maybe...probably. But in this moment I don't feel like I can handle it. I just want to jump ahead to May 30th. I'm pretty sure these fears are irrational but right now they totally feel legit. Ugh I just hate how quickly a day or a minute can turn around with just one call, text, or THOUGHT! Maybe I'll go back and read those verses I just posted or better yet look up some more. HAH! Right back atcha devil!!